Sunday, December 26, 2010

After it's over

spending the holidays with just your immediate family has some pluses:

• no need to go rushing off to see every single last member on either side of the family
• a leisurely day doing a little of this and a little of that
• no packing up gifts
• no upset Peanut who doesn't want to leave where she's at each time we have to go

and then there are the negatives

• it feels a little lonely not to have other family around
• not getting to see the reactions to the gifts we've thoughtfully chosen for our loved ones
• no access to Grandma's butter tarts (not that I'm allowed them anyway)
• missing out on the excitement of all the nephews who are still young enough to be super excited for the holidays

We're hoping that next year we'll be able to make the trip to be with family or that some family will be able to make the trip to be with us.

This was our last holiday season as a family of three and we tried to make it a special one for the Peanut. In just one month her whole world is going to change. She's going to have to share the space that is the center of our universe and come to terms with a new role as a big sister. My goal for the short four weeks ahead of us is to spend some extra special time with her and at the same time talk with her as much as possible about how things are going to change (schedules, sharing Momma and Daddy) and how things are going to stay the same (how much we love her, how she'll still get special Peanut only time).

On the one hand I'm very excited about getting the Bean out and meeting her. On the other hand I'm a little sad for the Peanut because she's been the one and only for four and a half years. That's a big change for anyone let alone a little girl. I'm not worried about the whole not having enough love to share between them thing. I've had enough experience with how much love for the Peanut explodes from me to know that there's no danger there.

For those of you who have more than one little, how did you get your oldest ready for that transition?

1 comment:

Linda in New Mexico said...

Now granted, they are by grands but GK is 4 years older than her little brother Ry. We did much as you have said you have done. Prepared her for the physical arrival of the new one. GK wanted to be a "big" sister and so we let her know she always would be the older and would have to look out for her brother. She still does. Sure there is jealousy and she has wanted to leave him at the occasional bus stop to wait for "his real family" tee hee, but for 6 years the love has outweighed the jealousy. My daughter still gives each child individual attention time and says that their snuggle time is off limits to the other one unless the other one says it's okay. Surprisingly, most times its just a love fest with all, but they have that choide. I think that has helped. The Olde Bagg, Linda

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