Tuesday, June 23, 2009

It's like deja vu but not really

As time goes on and my Peanut Butter Pie gets bigger and smarter and more loquacious, as she starts asking questions and wanting to learn about the world she lives in; I have these moments. Moments where I begin explaining something to her and the words of my parents dance from my lips.

Whether explaining that "Bees will not hurt you if you leave them alone." or telling her as we look at the neighbors white and pink apple blossoms that "those flowers are where apples come from" Each time I tell her something I hear the same words spoken to me in similar situations. I clearly remember my Dad telling me the same thing about apple blossoms in the back yard of our house in Calgary when I was about 9 or 10 years old.

My Mom is still around but my Dad passed on when I was 15; watching my daughter and my nephews grow up can be very bittersweet at times. Not being able to share these moments with him falls into the bittersweet category very neatly.

I truly believe that he knows and loves is grandchildren and that before they came to us, he was with them. Not being able to share our day to day lives is heartbreaking. I just know that my sister's boys would be the light in his eyes and that my daughter would have had him wrapped around her baby toe.

1 comment:

cabin + cub said...

I guess in some ways, we do sort of turn into our parents... since even though they might not always be there, they are always with us inside.

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